Mom Shares ‘Unpopular’ Regret About Her Third Pregnancy

A Michigan-based mother recently shared her unique perspective on finding out her baby’s gender in the delivery room.

The TikTok video shared by Sarah, 39, (@sarahmakesmelaugh) has garnered 284,900 views and 13,900 likes, and challenges the popular notion that waiting until birth to discover the baby’s gender is a magical experience. Sarah added an on-screen caption which reads: “Unpopular opinion: Finding out what you’re having in the delivery room wasn’t more exciting (for me).”

Sarah, 39, spoke to Newsweek about her experience with her third child, explaining why she regrets waiting to find out the gender until delivery.

“The video was about my third child—we had a boy first and then a girl, everyone told us we had to wait for the third so we did! I ended up giving birth to her very quickly and the experience was a bit shocking in and of itself,” she said. “When my husband told me it was a girl it was sort of overshadowed by the fact that she had come so quickly, my mom had missed her birth, etc. I wished I had found out sooner so that I could have really savored the moment of finding out!”

In the video, Sarah explains that she “regretted” not finding out the baby’s gender during the ultrasound, noting that it made it slightly harder for her to felt connected to her daughter initially. She mentioned that in her previous pregnancies, she had already chosen the baby’s name by this point, which made the baby feel less anonymous. She said: “It felt more chaotic.”

This sentiment contrasts sharply with the growing trend of couples choosing to wait until delivery to learn their baby’s gender. Many parents share emotional stories and videos online about the joy and surprise of finding out in the delivery room. However, Sarah’s experience highlights that this choice might not be as universally wonderful as often portrayed.

“I made the video after seeing a couple of ‘this is your sign to find out in the delivery room’ videos because my experience wasn’t the same and I had never heard anyone share that they regretted waiting,” Sarah added. Her TikTok has sparked conversations among parents, with many users agreeing with her.

One user said: “I found out at 15 weeks and had gender disappointment in a bad way. I am glad I had time to process those emotions and was able to be excited by it by the time he came.”

“I never saw how waiting makes it any more special. And I’m a preparer. I like to have everything way before time,” said another user.

But this isn’t the case for everyone, a third commenter said: “Oh I loooooved it. It was so special and exciting to me. But everyone is different and I love when people find out early and tell me lol!”

Finding out a baby’s gender has become a significant part of the pregnancy journey for many families, often celebrated with gender reveal parties. However, as Sarah’s story suggests, the timing and circumstances of this discovery can deeply impact the experience.

Dr. Christine Sterling, a board-certified OB/GYN, shared with Newsweek that birth is an “incredibly taxing event physically and emotionally.” Therefore finding out the gender on top of everything else can be overwhelming for some parents, and one user wrote: “Also like why do people not think birth is eventful enough?”

According to a 2007 Gallup poll, Americans are divided on whether to find out their baby’s sex before birth. About 51 percent prefer to wait until birth, while 47 percent want to know beforehand.

While many parents cherish the surprise element of waiting, the rise in popularity of gender reveal parties in recent years has made discovering the baby’s gender before birth more appealing.

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