For Mother’s Day, I Want Lawmakers to Stop Blocking Care for Trans Kids

Every mother wants what’s best for her children—especially when it comes to getting the health care they need. But right now, mothers in nearly half our states are suffering because their children are denied necessary medical care.

Twenty-four states have passed legislation limiting access to gender-affirming health care for young people. And 22 states criminalize health care professionals who administer this medically necessary, standard-of-care treatment for trans youth.

I’m the mother of a transgender daughter. I know how critical gender-affirming care was—and is—for her very existence.

All the major medical and pediatric associations recognize gender-affirming care, such as puberty blockers, to be the standard of care treatment for minors. Less than 1 percent of minors who take puberty blockers change their mind—but for that 1 percent, the effects are 100 percent reversible. In that case, the doctor helps them stop the blockers, and puberty resumes.

What’s not reversible is puberty itself.

If a child is born a transgender girl, as my child was, allowing male puberty would force her to grow facial hair and develop an Adam’s apple, as well as a deep voice. Similarly, a transgender boy would be forced to develop breasts and to menstruate.

This causes trauma so deep that children forced into this dystopian reality are at an increased risk of suicidal ideation. By contrast, receiving gender-affirming care increases well-being and other critical outcomes in trans youth.

Imagine it’s your body that lawmakers were debating. What right would I have to force you to become a woman if you are now a man, or vice versa?

This seems to be what far-right extremists want. A shocking lack of information dictates their policies. Instead, they force a fundamentalist ideology that contradicts science and medicine upon children and their families.

The science on this is clear: It’s the brain that determines gender, not the reproductive organs. Gender dysphoria happens in people who are born with brains and reproductive systems that don’t align.

My daughter was born with reproductive organs we associate with the male sex, but with a brain that lacked the influence of male hormones. Ever since she could talk, she was clear and adamant that she was a girl. When she turned 13, a team of doctors prescribed male puberty blockers to treat her gender dysphoria—and save her from the trauma of experiencing the wrong puberty.

My daughter is now a joyful, beautiful, and brilliant 23-year-old trans woman, making the world a better place for trans youth through her activism and her very existence. This is the best Mother’s Day gift I could receive.

Some people, contrary to scientific fact and evidence, insist the Earth is flat. Similarly, some people still insist that gender is binary and determined by reproductive organs. In a sense, these people are more dangerous than plain old flat earthers, because they’re making deadly policies to deny medically necessary care to our children.

Every mother, parent, or caretaker wishes for their children to be happy and free to be their true selves—without the interference and control of ignorant ideologues dictating whether or not they’re allowed to receive life-saving medical care.

Together, we must work to defeat the cruel and misguided policies that deny this freedom to children and their families. Let’s not tolerate one more Mother’s Day that will deny the health and well-being of our children.

Karen Dolan is a fellow at the Institute for Policy Studies.

The views expressed in this article are the writer’s own.